ODINSONSAYS

How long has it been?
My God, it’s not even seven days yet and already it feels like seven time reincarnations. On the other side, the hour of bichiya is approaching .

I’ve just got an e-mail from my employer. She told me she really satisfied with the works that i’ve done but that’s just the prologue…
She told me that at the first quarter of the year 2008, she will negotiate to put the books that i’ve done with her into an animated TV series (WHOA!!!!!!!!!)…I can’t believe it!!!! She even offered me to stay at San Diego and work with her…Oh my..
That’s not all…
The books that i’ve done will be published not in US only but also will be published in China. These are the biggest achievement in my live ever…
I hope my parents and my family will be proud of that fact…
and
to my lovely Irfa, i did these for you…

When all the jewels have lost their sparkle,
when the gold has lost it’s luster,
when the realm of aimless joy has become a mere hall of prison,
when all these plastic figurines that used to bring tons of happiness have become lifeless desire…

All that’s left is my dream of the upcoming moments with you…

Last night, i decided to plug some cartoons to my DVD player. I thought, it’ll be nice and relaxing to watch some cute things dancing on the tube.

I decided to watch Disney’s Dumbo and Pinochio…cos i havent see them in ages..

During the time when i watched those flicks, i cried like a sissy bastard (Especially when Dumbo hugging his mother’s trunk and when Gepetto crafting Pinochio). When the movies are over, i cried even harder..
Everybody would say that there’s no cartoon that’s sadder than "Grave of fireflies" (Yeah..sure..whateva..).
Those flicks really reminded me that…
How great the love of my parents to me after all these years..
After all these time, have i lost my innocence?
It will be sooo nice to see my parent’s happy face again.Can’t wait to go home.
and
I really can’t hardly wait to see a little baby sent from heaven above for me and my wife to love…

Lately, the distance has become more distant..
What went wrong?
Time for SELF evaluation

I see that someone is seems has a scheme to push my buttons or playing a little mind games hoping for a big gain out of me.
Very well, keep playing that game of yours continuously….but you can play it on your own..i won’t take part of this for i had enough mind games!
This is a mere soft warning, don’t ever think that i’m too stupid to know what it is. I’m not as naive as you think i am AND i am definitely not a play dough in your palm!!!

I really, really, really hate the use of politics in this!!

Either you score a big one or you may loose big time…think about it..

Today i just received some copies of the comic book that i work on. After quite a while, they’re finally here and now i hold them in my hands right now.
Unlike the previous works that i’ve done back home, i feel THIS is soooo special to me, why? Because……THEY’RE COMIC BOOKS!!!!! I’ve done illustrations for books, stickers, T shirts, cards etc. but now…i’ve done comic books!!! Hopefully this is the first step into my long run of my dreams.
Yeah, me and my publisher had a few ‘heated moments’ as you probably may call it but the creator already contacted me and she personally would like me to be her book’s regular artist, she even gave me a personal notes on how she loves my works No biggie but…sumtimes, it’s nice being wanted and needed..

Speaking of which, gotta finish what John and David’s projects.

Gotta face the current wind,
the last number shall never be the primary number…after all, a rookie can never compete with the seasoned ones.
At this time…when the fuel of one slowly begin to deplete, the distance become more distant and everybody keeps pushing the buttons and abuse the machine.
Gotta face the wall, gotta cross the river…
Got no one to talk about this…

Maybe i’m just too tired……..

Old lessons that i always forgot :

Always remember : Listen to your head instead of your heart.

No one in this life is with me constantly, no one is completely on my side.

Everyone keeps asking me to see things through their eyes but no one ever try to see things through my eyes.

Totally expendable, replaceable and forgettable..thats me.

I’m always at the position where every sides keeps pushing me and suck my life force outta me.

I’m also a human being who also have phobias, traumas and problems like anyone else.

SHOOT!!! i also have feelings! i am not a battery-less robot! i also have my own side of the story! i also have tons of problems! i also happen to be a human being who were born from a mother’s womb!

WHO CARES????

Hopefully GOD listen to my innerself right now…hopefully YOU’ll understand what i feel right now…hopefully YOU can prove how wrong i am…hopefully…this is not a fool’s hope..

I never say this before…
Have you ever felt that you’d move your world just to be with someone that you care for but it turned out that someone (s) only remember you when they’re in trouble or when they need a bucket to hold their tears and biles.
For years i have wipe their asses for all the skit that they’ve done, just in the name of the so called ‘brotherhood’…(yeah..right..brotherhood….my ass!!)
and..what did i got in return? they ran and all i got were the craps on my hand.
I guess the old saying is true: no good deeds goes unpunished.
Got a different point of view? be my guest, its a free world anyway but know this:
this is what i’ve experienced for the last decade and i’m not so lucky in this area like you are.